Chapter 3 – Dr. Religion & Associates
So I beat it down the street and knock on Dr. Religion’s door and it seems like he’s a real scout, he’s a regular fellow, and he said, “Come on in here, Lester Roloff, I’m glad to see you!” And I said, “Yes I’m glad to see you. I’ve been up to see old Dr. Law.” To which Dr. Religion said, “Oh, he’s ancient he’s an antique. Modern folks don’t go to him. He hasn’t had the proper training. He doesn’t know anything about the latest modes of medicine.”
Well, that sounded good to me and I said, “I don’t like him myself. Dr. Religion, would you just kind of run over me and see what’s wrong?” He said, “Sure!” After his examination, he said, “Why, there’s nothing seriously wrong with you. I recommend that you start going to church.” And I said, ‘Which one?” “Oh,” he said, “just any of them will be all right.”
So the next Sunday, I was in church and the next but I didn’t get any better. I went back to Dr. Religion and I said, “Dr. Religion, I don’t believe I’m any better.” He said, “Well, did you start going to church?” I said, “Sure. I’ve been going every Sunday.” Then he said, “Did you join and get baptized?” “Why,” I said, “no.” He said, “Do that, that will make you feel better.” I said, “I’ll sure do it and get my wife to also.”
So I went down to the church and joined it and got baptized, but I didn’t feel any better for very long and I went back to Dr. Religion and I said, “Dr. Religion, there’s something wrong I’m not really any better.” “Well,” he said, “are you really working at it? Take a job in the church and start helping others.” And so I did.
But I got weary in the struggle and somebody recommended a couple of brothers who were doctors – Dr. Be Good and Dr. Do Good and I went to them, but to no avail. There was no certainty and no assurance of salvation. And then somebody recommended Dr. Hope So. After which I went to Dr. Think So and neither one of them was able to help me. And now – weary, tired, exhausted, in despair and at the end of self – I decided I’d go back to Dr. Law.